31stDecember 2018 – Swallow test number……..who knows! It was a Monday and today was an exciting day. My swallow test on Christmas eve had shown that the hole in my oesophagus was the width of a cotton thread so the expectations of todays test were high! I was in a positive festive mood as I... Continue Reading →
I was a patient on Crownhill ward for 10 weeks. It became my second home. My Saturday nights consisted of writing my name on my bedpans for the week and chewing ice chips and spitting them out! So many milestones were reached along with lots of memories made, most of which are too small to... Continue Reading →
That night my world turned upside down, again. Having become comfortable with my surroundings, I was moved to the opposite side of my bay late in the evening. In my previous space went someone who was fresh out of surgery and with me being so wide awake, I was quite nosey to watch the recovery... Continue Reading →
Whilst lying on the bed for what seemed like forever, I became really aware of my surroundings. I was still attached to so many bags and drips, one of which was TPN. ‘Total Parenteral Nutrition’ was my food. Tailor made to my bodies needs every day, it went through my 'PICC' line straight into my bloodstream,... Continue Reading →
It was the start of a busy day! A nurse told me that I would be seen be a physio who would get me walking. Walking? I didn’t know how to walk! I had completely forgotten how to walk. How was this possible? Whilst waiting for the physio, I remember fumbling on my phone, looking for videos... Continue Reading →
After a horrible first night on Crownhill ward, I woke up and it was dark. I hadn't slept well and I was so disorientated. My obs were taken every 2/3hrs and I felt scared. Banging and beeping noises were coming from a building site outside and I was confused. I didn’t know where I was... Continue Reading →
On 3rd December 2018, late evening, I left ICU and went to a ward. My memories of this day are vague but what memories I do have are quite clear. I’d spent the day on and off a commode…and I don’t think further detail is required; suffice to say that my body was waking up!... Continue Reading →
We’ve reached the end of my Delirium Diaries but there are a few loose ends! My deliriums fall into 2 categories: ‘I remember exactly’ and ‘odd bits’! I have 10 vivid deliriums that absolutely, categorically happened. Now we know that they didn’t and that in reality it was my mind playing tricks because of infection, medication,... Continue Reading →
From Delirium to Reality 